Kindling a Fire: Summer Work

If you’re anything like me, by the time summer arrives, you’ve already compiled a long and overly ambitious to-do list. With the lazy days of summer stretching far into the distance, I often think I’ll have time to do anything and everything. But over the years, I’ve come to realize that I’m often happiest when I keep my summer ambitions to a more realistic scope: a simple family vacation, some good books, and a few baseball games. OK, more than a few baseball games.

Kids are sometimes the victims of overscheduling even more than adults. Parents want to provide their children with consistently enriching experiences, but between camps, travel tournaments, internships, and academic work, it can seem like there’s no time to just be a kid.

With that in mind, let me offer some simple, practical advice that I give our students at Cincinnati Country Day School at our annual closing ceremony. Consider it a more realistic summer to-do list for your kids:

For students 10 and under, your goal is simple: Do something entirely by yourself. Ask your parents first, of course. But then go outside and build something. Walk to the corner store to buy some milk. Organize a game. Explore a new trail. Try something messy, uncertain, and real… without an adult managing every step. You’ll be surprised by how capable you are.

Educational psychologists call this “self-efficacy” – the belief that you can solve your own problems and overcome challenges life throws at you. It’s the foundation of confidence, resilience, and what researchers term an “internal locus of control,” or the conviction that your actions, not just your circumstances, shape your outcomes.

But these traits can only be developed if parents give their children genuine autonomy to try new things – and resist the urge to rescue them when they inevitably fail. The scraped knee, the awkward lemonade stand, the homemade fort that barely holds up – these are invaluable learning experiences afforded by summer.

For middle schoolers, your charge is to read deeply, not dutifully. Find a book that’s interesting but challenging and read it without a phone buzzing in the background. Immerse yourself in the world of the text and slow your mind down to the rhythm of prose. The act of focused reading – no tabs open, no TikTok on deck – does more than build vocabulary. It nurtures attention, cultivates empathy, and trains the imagination to dwell, not scroll.

As the French novelist Marcel Proust once said, “Every reader, as he reads, is actually the reader of himself.” In today’s frenetic and distracted world, deep reading can be an act of meditation and reflection. Summer is the perfect moment for this introspection, especially for middle schoolers.

For high schoolers, my challenge is this: Get involved in something that matters to you. Whether it’s a community garden, a summer service project, or just a neighborhood clean-up, what matters is that you choose a cause that doesn’t come with college credit or a LinkedIn bullet point. The key is to commit yourself to a cause for its own intrinsic value rather than its social media impact or career potential. Work hard at something you care about, and then tell no one what you’ve done. This authentic curiosity and commitment to service is a good step towards building not just a strong résumé, but a life of purpose.

These summer work assignments are easy, fun, and, in many cases, free. But they require parents (like me) to step back and let our kids take charge of their experiences. I understand the instinct to structure, protect, and plan every detail this summer. But if we’re always smoothing the path ahead, we deprive our kids of the very experiences that let them grow. So let them fail at that new attempt at independence. Let them be bored as they try to retrain their focus on deep reading. Allow them to tolerate uncertainty and discomfort in pursuit of their service project.

Whatever you do this summer, don’t fill every slot in your child’s calendar. Leverage the potential of summer to unlock growth in your children, but build a rhythm that promotes exploration, relaxation, and reflection. Oh, and make sure you leave room for the occasional baseball game.

"Kindling a Fire" is a column submitted regularly to Indian Hill Living by Head of School Rob Zimmerman '98. This ran in the June 2025 edition of the publication.